It’s been a very long time since I covered a british comedy….in fact if memory serves the last one I covered would have been waaaaay back in Season 4 When I took a look at “Whoops Apocalypse” Reviewing comedies isnt quite as rewarding as the other types of films I talk about on here…for one thing if they’re bad comedies they can be incredibly painful to sit through in a totally unenjoyable way and in another being a rather passionate comedy fan. if I want to invest some of my time into talking about comedy, I want to make sure im covering something I’ll want to remember.
Mad Cows is not one of those movies…its not even close to being one of those movies. As mentioned I first heard about this film via Cook’d and Bomb’d a message board that specialises in comedy. This was listed by one of there users as one of the worst british comedies ever made. I still dont think its THAT bad…but my god…give this one a swerve if you can.
It’s not fundamentally awful it’s just the fact its so border irritating. Anyway; I’ve said my piece. i’ll let the review do the death blow.
(This isnt an official poster…the official poster was too 90’s…it said nothing about the film and looked garish…I Mean; this poster doesnt really say anything about the film either…but it’s closer than the official one…)
It was Iain Lee who first introduced me to “Slade In: ‘Flame’ ” via his radio show a few years ago. If memory serves he dedicated nearly an hour of one of his shows to Slade, the band and this film in particular. mentioning that it was one of the best films he’d ever seen. So naturally I immediately went to look for a copy, at which point my testicles retracted into my pelvis as I saw the price was way more than I could ever afford.
I was incredibly lucky last year to score this film for a tenner. when; at the time prices were between 75 and 200 pounds for a copy. Since making this review the price has drastically decreased…it’s still a bit pricy for a nearly 10 year old DVD (Between 15 and 25 pounds at the time of writing) but if you like what you see in this review, I say go and grab it. it’s a really nice little movie…I’d maybe stop short of saying it’s essential. But Im happy that I have a copy and if nothing else it introduced me to the world of “Slade” which; well, other than that christmas song. there wasnt really a whole lotta Slade going on in my life.
I would genuinely like to see what a Bluray scan of this film would surface…it’d also be nice to have a proper “Making of” for this one, as while the hour long interview with Noddy Holder present on the disc is MORE than welcome…it’s only really one side of the story and it’d be nice to hear about the whole bands experiences (Or even the writers and directors thoughts…assuming they arnt suffering from a case of fatal death)
A great little film. genuinely. and one I’ll probably end up digging out again sooner rather than later.
(This poster is WAY too busy…but the DVD art is WAY too minimalist…it’s all or nothing with Slade…this was the learning curve I’ve been on.)
This one really was a difficult watch in all honesty. it’s a testamony to how pre-conceived opinions on what a film is about can drastically effect the overall enjoyment of the piece. In the UK this was genuinely marketed as a movie for young kids. the cover for the VHS and DVD releases were both incredibly kid friendly (See the poster at the beginning of my review for a better idea of exactly how kid friendly it looked) and the back of the box was colourful and written in a way to make it easy for kids to get an idea of what this is about. all mentions of Socialism and communism or our lord Jesus christ is omitted in the blurb on the back of the case for this one and Bernard cribbins is mentioned multiple times as a means to try and sell this to them.
Genuinely; I think Abby home video bought this and didnt realise what they’d got their hands on till it was too late to back out of it…either that or they planned to put this out as a kids film knowingly with no regard for what it actually is about…which just plain sucks in all honesty. I think in the hands of a decent distributor (And with a decent remaster and maybe a couple of extras) this could really make a rather lovely set. Im not one for talking about “Dream releases” for content here but I think I can make an exception with this one as it kind of feels right to give it a decent release. Here’s what I’d do with it if I got my hands on it.
*4K Scan of the original film elements followed by a full remaster (clean up, colour grade and levels check)
*Both cuts of this film (Both the english Cribbins version and the original Swedish release with subs) available on the disc (The English version to be recreated using the 4k swedish scan as nothing is significantly altered and only a scene or two have been removed so it would be easy to resynch the english dub track)
*Commentary with Cribbins + A couple of film critics (Im looking at you Kim Newman and Alan Jones!) to talk about the history of this film, the animation style, why the themes of the film probably didnt take to a british audience and any juicy tidbits about Per Ã…hlin and Tage Danielsson
*A documentary following the production of this feature + a brief history of it’s broadcasting history both in Sweden and the UK
* (If possible…hell it’s my fantasy why not) An isolated Score track…for all that lurrrrvely Jazz and Bossa.
*a mini Documentary about politics in christmas movies. dealing specifically aroun the socialist themes raised in this feature and a discussion on whether Christmas is more personified by the Left or the Right.
*old promotional materials (TV spots, radio spots if their are any,) both from the UK and Europe
*A NICE. Bluray cover. using newly drawn artwork thats fitting for the 15 – 30 year old audience that this film is clearly based at.
*Reversable artwork containing the original Abby home video release cover artwork…Okay im joking…but what I would like is:
*Reversable artwork that uses it’s swedish title alongside some of the original promotional artwork (See the image used in my thumbnail of this review)
Obviously this release will never happen in a million years. but this movies got such a decent and wholesome message I really wish it would. it’s charming and to see it have such a shoddy release history really is a proper downer. Still…at least we got the chance to have it localised. had it not been I may never have heard of it.
(The animation still creeps me out a bit…it reminds me a bit of Wondershowzens more abstract animation sections)
It’s been ages since I’ve covered an “Adult” film on here…I think in part it’s because reviewing erotic cinema can be a bit of a challenge. The line can be so fine between erotic cinema and just flat out porn that it can be really quite debatable as to whether im making an accurate critical assessment of it. Well that and Youtube has a barmy everytime so much as a nipple flies past the screen (This weeks review has been age restricted out of common decency)
There are several erotic films that I personally hold in very high regard that others consider really quite tacky or just porn. I mention in the video that im a massive Tinto Brass fan. but whereas most critics site his earlier works (Movies such as: The Howl, Salon Kitty or The Key) as prime examples of explorations of relationships and eroticism I personally much prefer his output in the 90’s which is much more bubblegum but with a distinct tinge of nastiness behind it. Not malice for the acts. but malice from misunderstood characters who slowly over the course of the films either learn better and become accepting of the situations in this film. Or get punished for continuing to not accept the scenarios. Movies like “All Ladies Do it“, “Cheeky” and “P.O Box Tinto Brass” are all quite comic in places but equally do have some slightly uncomfortable moments within them that make them challenging and engaging movies.
Emmanuelle was a film that very much put me in mind of Tinto Brass. it kind of feels like the missing link between his more serious 80’s art films and his more “Puff piece” light hearted 90’s films. I really genuinely quite enjoyed this one. the ending was deeply unplesent and the mysoginy sprinkled throughout I could quite happily do without but sans those elements this is quite a reasonable exploration of sexuality. I really do want to get my hands on the sequel just to see what the series did next and I really hope they didnt just go “Full porn” too quickly. Having seen the Emmanuelle TV series (both “2000” and “In Space”) I can confirm that at least by the 1990’s it had gone full softcore porn…Dont get me wrong there were some interesting ideas in there from a science fiction perspective…but a few interesting ideas sprinkled into porn is still porn ultimately. Honestly? I’d be interested in finding this films tipping point. though I feel it may be a while before I get my hands on another one of these.
[Due to several copyright takedowns by the melts over at “Studiocanal” this episode is now being hosted uncut on Breach.tv – Please click the above link!]
(There are 3-4 posters for this film, but they’re all either in terrible quality or explicit. This one was the only one I could find that was neither of these things…and even then I had to crop it…It’s not my favourite poster i’ve seen though…)
And so we have a bit of a work in progress/pilot here! long before I started making reviews or even before I’d set up this website I would more often than not spend my time sat in a comfortable arm chair with my very good friend Ben watching movies in the front room of my house/flat/cardboard box and generally being irritating, getting drunk, eating copious amounts of terrible food and taking the absolute piss out of whatever was happening on the screen.
I enjoyed my time doing that so much that I invited Ben to join me in picking up more or less where we left off, only this time we’d do it live with a microphone in the room.
So what better way to open a feature length audio commentary series where people drink, eat pizza and chat crap than with a gloriously bleak film about the literal apocalypse!
Something a bit different today and a bit of a bonus here. While working with Ben on producing the Public information films special we had some downtime and we decided to watch the feelgood film of the 80’s “Threads” better still we recorded the experience which I present to you here as a fully functioning feature commentary!
(Warning!: this is not as well researched or thought out as my typical reviews, throughout this both me and Ben are drinking and enjoying the finest takeaway my city has to offer…this is much more laid back and mainly for fun…with that in mind I hope you enjoy…)
This one can be chalked up to another “I didnt know what I was buying, BUT LOOK AT THAT TITLE!!!” style escapade. Theres a goodwillesq Charity shop that I frequent when Im running low on titles to review (I say “Shop” its really more of a thrift wearhouse) It was on route to a local dump and I have to assume at this point that quite a lot of the stuff that ended up in said Charity shop only did so because it was a shorter distance and often less fuss than dealing with the people who ran the dump.
I’d visit them at the end of every month and in amongst maze like arrangements of vomit and food stained sofas, broken kitchen appliences and Childrens toys that looked like they’d been tied to a tree and abandoned for the best part of 40 years I’d find the “DVD section”… I put it in quotes because realistically it was a book case full of DVD’s, pc games and anything else that could fit in a DVD bookcase.
While usually made up of TV series (Believe me if you’ve ever wondered where the biggest collection of “24” and “Midsummer murders” boxsets were held up you need go no further than this place. Nestled in amongst the TV trash and the mainstream titles that time had forgot (14 Copies of “Percy Jackson and the lightning thief” says it wasnt the most popular movie in the world) you’d find the good stuff. Films like “let’s ruin Dads day”, “Santa and the three bears” and the grail for me? “Hollywood DVD” releases and “DVD multipack” sets. The former a cheapo label that mainly deals with knock off copycat movies or the kinds of low budget affairs from the 80’s and 90’s that would make a prisoner on death row beg for the end. And the latter 9 times out of 10 being bundled in groups of 5, 10, 15, 20, 25, 50 and very very rarely 100 and paired with a DVD player during the early days of the formats release.
Sadly, in both of these labels cases they’re sadly on the way out. improper storage, mass binnings and the general idea that these are worthless discs has rendered large swathes of them either scratched beyond repair or succumb to the deadly sickness that is “Discrot” (Basically when DVD’s were first being manufactured they used a plastic coating on the “read” side to protect the discs from damage not realising that that same plastic coating degrades when damaged and slowly turns into an acid that eats the disc.
Due to there prevelence you’ll always find these discs knocking around at CEX or in charity shops though I highly reccommend you check the silver side before you buy. They were manufactured cheap and sold cheaper with the understanding they were there to showcase how crisp DVD could look on a budget.
I dont visit that Charity emporium very often these days…I think there was a change in management a short while ago as I went on 3 seperate occasions over a 6 month period and all of the “Good stuff” was gone…replaced with actual proper mainstream titles that were legitimately good, there were even blurays thrown into the mix! and while I dont exactly need to find any more films to fill in my collection (I literally have stacks and boxes of tapes/dvds in my room right now). I cant help but feel a bit sad that a ritual that I did for years has been taken out of my hands…I’d clear them out of all the films they didnt want because noone in the general public would ever dream of buying “Cyborg 3” well…not unless they were genuinely mad.
This was one of the films I picked up in my final proper haul from that place and while I dont have anything to add that my review doesnt cover here…just bear in mind that when I pulled this out of a festering stack of “Little britain” DVD’s, just for a split second, I’d found my “Good stuff” for the day…and it made the trawling all worth while.
TYTD Reviews 