Dont Look Under the bed (1999)

This was one of those reviews that I feel was kind of Skewed by hype. Y’see had I gone into this movie without the 300+ youtube critics who’ve already spoken about this film claiming it’s the “Scariest Disney horror movie ever EVER!” then I’d have probably come out the other side of it maybe a bit more positive about the whole thing.

Equally however, had those 300+ critics not posted their thoughts on this I would have never have heard of this film and it almost certainly wouldnt have ended up being an episode of this show.

The reality is, this is just a bit middle of the road. theres some really nice ideas here but they’re seldom acted on and in many cases feel more like missed opportunities rather than carefully honed hits.

It does somewhat surprise me that this film hasnt seen anything in the way of an official release and seemingly it hasnt been rebroadcast in quite a while (Though it has at least had 1 HD screening that I could find) I think kids would probably really get into it in all honesty…it just wasnt really for me…

 

(Sadly this one doesnt have a “proper” poster or artwork so this advert for it will have to do…It kind of serves it’s purpose but I think they could have maybe been a bit more…creative.)

The WNUF Halloween Special (2013)

I count myself exceedingly lucky that I have been able to see a film like “The WNUF Halloween Special” these kinds of films typically fall through the cracks of cinema history and I cannot stress enough how hard it is to find films like these, especially when you live in the UK.

The WNUF halloween special is no exception. as it stood up until recently the only way to get your hands on a copy of this film if you were UK based and wernt lucky enough to swipe up a copy of this when they were first selling them on DVD and VHS was to spend a frankly extortionate amount importing a very pricy NTSC only VHS or Region 1 DVD from the states, then forking out again for a player to play said expensive Tape/Disc and due to the cultish nature of this movie if you didnt pick a copy up during the initial US sales drive, there was literally no other way to get your hands on this film.

Well…there was illegal torrenting. Which unfortunately was the route I had to take in order to see this simply due to the complications listed above. While it probably wont bring much comfort to the Director/Producer. Chris. I would be honoured to help dub and distribute this tape across european terratories. PAL users have been neglected of a film like this for too long and if I can help from my little dubbing station here in the UK then please get in touch. I’d love to try and help you out in spreading this frankly amazing piece of cinema.

There is no European release of this film. and with a Sequel coming up on the horizon hopefully in a couple of years. I really hope that this one gets the worldwide release it really quite frankly deserves.

 

(This bloody poster…jesus its gorgeously done. Serious Kudos to whoever designed it. They’re a Master of the craft clearly)

Snoop Doggs Hood of Horror (2006)

I really wasnt kidding when I said in this review that I literally “By chance” stumbled on a copy of this movie. Amazon has a somewhat manic “Search” function and more often than not the results you want are often not the results you find.

I found this movie in particular when I went to go and pick up a copy of “Fade to black” and it appeared in my “Recommended because you bought” section. until then I had never seen, heard or smelt of it but I knew based on that cover and the price alone that I had to pick it up. I know Snoop himself has Directed, Produced and acted in movies in the past but to see something so utterly ludicrous really is quite fantastic.

I honestly think Snoop must enjoy doing stuff like this because the stories I’ve heard of him over the years (From paying to have a section of his house refitted to look like “The Rovers Return” from Coronation street, to his infamous “Pass the blunt” movie nights) has me convinced this guy likes his shite films as much as you or me.

Its surprisingly well made trash cinema and I honestly think this one may have something of a resurgence in years to come. particularly for it’s campy dark comedy undertones. for the price it’s currently going for I definitely recommend you go and look this one up!

(All the artwork for this one is so distressing…I really feel if they’d got the marketing downa  little bit better that they may have had a serious hit on their hands…)

Witches Night out (1978)

Well! it’s halloween again! and that means that once again I get to dip into the archive of all things spooky and pull out a few choice selections to highlight and hopefully help you guys in making your halloween go with a bang!

Last year the theme was Zombies (In particular Romero’s “Of the dead” series) and this year when put to a poll you lovely lot voted that you wanted to see a “Halloween highlights” run…I think going forward I may end up doing a themed year, then a non themed year and so on…it’s nice to work to a theme but equally this has been an absolute hoot and it’s unearthed a load of extra goodies that im now saving till next time!

Kicking things off this season we have “Witches night out!”  a special I’d only heard of last year funnily enough around about the same time I uploaded my first halloween special! since then it’s sat on my shelf gathering dust but I made it my duty to watch and talk about it this year, and it’s not without good reason! it’s short sweet and very very wonderful!

Halloween is one of my favourite times of years…it’s basically christmas but without the stress that comes with christmas. it has all the joys of nostalgia for childhood and tooth decay that comes with eating offensive amounts of boiled sugar. Pure bliss!

I do hope you enjoy my season this year! theres some great little movies coming up and im sure you’ll find one that’ll make your halloween!

(Seriously the theme tune to this special is absolutely out of this world!)

The Incredible Voyage of Stingray (1980)

Well…this ones over half an hour long…I really dont know what else you’d like me to say about this movie in all honesty!

It was an absolute pleasure working with Alex on this project, the guy has a real passion for all things Gerry Anderson and I genuinely hope I get the opportunity to work with the man again in future (We are currently planning some other events in future) and I learned so much about British Science fiction that i’d never known before.

I’ve always personally been way more into my Stingray and Joe 90 than my thunderbirds related stuff. but to be able to sit down as an adult and actually apreciate these for what they were. great little pieces of science fiction was really a great experience to have. and one that i’ll hopefully be able to experience again sooner rather than later.

I may well cover more of these TV movies in future (they’re all available on VHS at this point) the biggest issue is simply finding them and not having to cut an arm off in order to pay for them!

But yes. Enjoy this for what it is…a pretty decent little TV movie thats maybe a little dated! and I’ll see you all next week for the big Halloween celebrations!

(The VHS cover isnt all that inspiring in honesty…but once again I made a Hi-res capture because noone else has ever bothered to seemingly)

 

Stingray.jpg

Finishing the Complete Fourth Series (2018)

Series 4 was a sturdy season if ever there was one. While I have quite fond memories of the opening half, the latter half to me did seem to drag a little. Though this was almost entirely my own fault.y’see when I was structuring this season I made 2 seemingly small mistakes which completely through my season off kilter. first and foremost. I overproduced. there was a “Red Triangle” episode that was supposed to be part of this season. But due to my collaboration with Raymond it ended up being pushed off the schedule and into Season 5 (You’ll see it in November)…but that threw me out by nearly a week due to the time it took to make the episode.

The other issue that I encountered was that I had assumed that “Armed Response” was some kind of cop drama…it wasnt. it’s a martial arts movie. and I didnt realise it was a martial arts movie till I was sat watching it and it had been locked into the schedules. meaning that an entire months worth of videos was almost entirely made up of martial arts/action movies! which kind of began to grate on me a little bit (Im having similar problems with season 5 at the minute as I’ve discovered I have a few too many kids films in the mix for my taste personally)

Ignoring that though Season 4 has some gems in there in my opinion. “Tales from the Quadead zone” was a brilliantly fun little film to sit through, I was able to continue my reviews of the live action Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movies, I covered “Braindead“! a Peter Jackson Classic! and I had my mind fully rotted away by “Bikini Model Academy” and it was an out and out pleasure to be able to work with my “Comedy dining experience” partner in crime Ben in producing my first year anniversair special on Public Information Films (PIF’s to you and me)

This was also the season that would see the launch of “The ______Comedy dining experience” and im hoping there’ll be more of these in future! so do keep your eyes peeled!

All in all, I liked working on this season…half of it was done while I was in a very mellow place and half of it was done under some very heavy stress…whether that shows or not I cant really say…this is also the last season where I really get a say on whats being reviewed until 2019 at least…what with Halloween and Christmas on the Horizon…so savour it! it’ll be a while till we’re back on the freewheeling days of pick what you want!

 

(It’s a shorter run than normal, but I like to think that just means the quality is more concentrated)

The B-Movie Hall of Fame: Part 1 (2018)

 

I’ve always been reluctant to do “Multi film” reviews…I suppose it’s because I like the detail that longer form reviews offer and that it lets me add a bit more of a personal touch to the movie im talking about to go in depth and talk at length about my own personal feelings about the film i’ve selected.

However, when I was contacted by Joel to take part in the B-movie hall of fame over on the movieforums.com (A message board I can highly recommend) I kind of felt compelled to do this. in part because I thought it would be fun to try and write without notes for a change (Every review I do is heavily noted…I currently have 7 books worth!) and also because it meant that editing these could be a bit more creative and fun.

It was nice being able to check out movies I’d not seen before and especially films that i’d have probably have skipped had they not been on this list…hell 2 of my new favourite movies ever I’ve found while doing this challenge alone!

So far Im really enjoying it in all honesty and I cant wait to get round to watching the remaining 6 sooner rather than later (Though I’ll be honest; time is most definitely working against me these days…there’ll be more info in an upcoming Blog I have planned…if I ever find the time)

With October bringing in Halloween it’ll be a little while before Part 2 of this makes it’s appearence though theres some absolute classics on the list yet to watch so do keep an eye out in November when it should go live!

(Seriously go watch “The Child” and “Jack Frost” if you’ve never seen them before…Great stuff!)

Carnosaur 3: Primal Species (1996)

Im afraid this is another film where I dont really have a terrific amount to say post-viewing…in fact thats the main reason that im so late in actually posting this to the site. I really struggled to think of what to say about this film that I dont already cover in the review itself…its a terrifically goofy little dinosaur movie and im still stunned that someone as prolific as Roger Corman would have gone anywhere near this thing…

But! here we are. and yes. quite frankly im as confused as you are. My recommendation? Go and watch the film first and then come and see my review. I do talk at length about some of the more spoilery elements of this film in this review and I feel it may do the movie more justice to approach it blind. So yeh…go watch this! it’s genuinely one of the stranger movies I’ve seen this year so far.

(Not the best poster…not the best movie…meh…)

Kiss Meet the Phantom of the Park (1978)

Season 5 Episode 1! and this is the final season of 2018! yep! this one will take us right the way up to the end of the year. It comes with a massive pro and a massive con in the sense that this is the season where both everything is pretty much scheduled and planned well well in advance. But at the same time because everything is scheduled in so early it means effectively for 2-3 months of this season I’m almost totally inflexible in terms of just adding films in to review.

This is because of both Halloween and Christmas both of which take up about 4-5 weeks worth of episode slots leaving September (Which is a 3 week runner this year) and November (Which admittedly has 5 weeks in it…but 3 of those have had to be scheduled as well due to conflicts in the last season and ongoing projects)

It means that while im very grateful that I can sit here in September and tell you exactly what episodes are going to be running pretty much right the way up to the end of the year. it can get a little bit boring because I know everything that’s coming up and equally I know I cant really deviate from that schedule because seasonal capitalising and all that…

Luckily September is a very flexible very free month! and i’ve decided to do 3 very different style films while I have the chance! So kicking things off Here’s “Kiss meet the Phantom of the Park” a 1978 made for TV movie that genuinely bewilders me even now. Why did they bother making it?…I mean I know they had their comic persona’s but even then who sat down with the band and managed to convince them that this would be a good idea? they surely must be a genius of their field.

I recently had the pleasure of sitting down to watch the sort of spiritual follow up to this movie “Scooby doo and Kiss: a Rock and Roll Mystery” and somehow one of two things happened…firstly they somehow managed to outweird this movie…I really dont know how…but they did. And secondly…THEY SET THE THING BACK IN A THEME PARK!…Why!?…Why did they think this would work again!? apart from (And this is the only reasoning I can ascertain) the idea that parents who grew up with “Phantom of the park” will be like “Oh hey!! yeahhhhh!!!!!”…

This isnt the greatest film in the world…hell this isnt even really a mediocre picture…but I think the review will put it into better words than I can type here.

 

(All the other posters are inferior. THIS. This is the coolest poster Kiss have ever been involved in…It says nothing about the film…but it doesnt need to…it’s awesome.)

Lady Terminator (1989)

It’s collaboration time again! this time with a good friend of mine Raymond. This has been many months in the making we wern’t entirely sure of the best format to present this one in. I like Raymonds video style. he always finds a very entertaining angle to his reviews and he’s arguably one of the most thorough critics in his field when it comes to finding out info.

In the end we settled that I would give way on my channel to him and vice versa for me! as a result this weeks episode is a majority Raymond based episode! it’s a corker and im very proud that the months of scripting and working we did together finally came together and paid off.

Over on Raymonds youtube channel you will find a review for 1993’s Terminator woman in which I had the pleasure of turning up (I’ll be posting that one on here as well seperately)  but in the mean time here is arguably one of the strangest movies I’ve spoken about in a while.

With this video we finally draw a close on season 4. it’s been the longest season to date and while making it I had my doubts…though looking back. im kind of happy I went the way I did with this one…next week will pretty much be quiet so Join us in September for the first episode of Season 5! which will take us right up to the end of the year!

(This is technically a part 2 of 2 I’d advise you go and watch “Terminator woman’s” review first also this is a fairly meh poster…its too busy and blocky)