Cyborg Cop 2 (1994)

As part of our 5th Anniversairy celebrations, we once again took a dip into the old archive and boy howdy did I land on a winner with this one.

I loved ‘Cyborg Cop 2’ its a daft, weird, stupid, goofy movie and I SINCERELY hope it gets a proper bluray release in future because…my GOD this films wild. the original is positively stationary compared to this things utter crazy. and I love it, love it, LOVE it for that.

What are you even reading this for!? go watch Cyborg cop 2…right now!

OH! and this ones blocked in several places across the globe (bloody rubbish bloody copyright theiving bastards.) But it’s okay, I’ve uploaded a universally watchable copy to Odysee which you can watch by clicking here

Poor Poster…FUN movie!

Tough and Deadly (1995)

So, as part of our 5th Anniversairy celebrations i’d made the decision well in advance that I wanted to try and steep a more than decent chunk of this season in references and call backs to things i’d mentioned in the past. is it self indulgent? absolutely. But given im very unlikely to make 10 years on this platform under the current format, I have to take what moments I can as and when they appear!

I knew I wanted to cover some of the usuals, an “American Ninja Movie”, my continued slog through “Best of the Best”. I absolutely wanted to revisit “The Dragon Lives Again” but I’d always remembered that in the past I’d sworn i’d cover “Tough and Deadly” and given that was nearly 5 years ago and that it still hadnt happened. I absolutely thought this had to be righted.

In many ways; I wasnt entirely won over by this one, despite what good it does do. frustratingly the experience of covering this one was somewhat tarnished by events that happened around the time of publication; Y’see, I owned this movie on a ‘double feature’ set with another Billy Blanks movie “Talons of the Eagle” and literally the same week that this movie review went live, “Talons of the Eagle” got announced as having a frankly Stunning Bluray release by Vinegar Syndrome…Which did somewhat take the wind out of my sails for this one on release day.

Still! it’s a fun movie! and while I dont think i’d be exactly ecstatic to recommend it, i’d say it’s worth checking out at least once!

That poster says LITERALLY nothing about the film. LITERALLY nothing.

The “Never Say Never Again” (1983) Comedy Dining Experience

While our good friend Roger was having an “Eggcellent” time working on “Octopussy” An evil cabal of writers, media personalities and satanists were performing a secret virginal sacrifice to the gods of “Why did this need to exist” in order to restore an ancient evil who’s toupee contained within its woven fabrics untold horrors that had been sealed successfully away in 1972.

They succeeded and Randy Grampa was resurrected to unleash more terror and casual sexism upon the unsuspecting crowd of 1980’s New Wave hipsters who…quite rightfully dismissed and disowned the film as the utter work of evil that it is.

This week, Dan and Ben take one for the team…in more ways than one. Still! we get some good stories out during the commentary, so it wasnt all to waste its just…ugh…Im really not a Connery fan. The guy had like…2…maybe 3 good bond movies…the rest…ugh.

UGH.

The Ninja Sqaud (1986)

I cant believe it took almost 5 years to get onto a Godfrey Ho movie! Since this review was published I have been made aware that I’ve covered a couple of movies that Ho was *rumoured* to have worked on and in one case a film he was responsible for supervising distribution in the west for.

But this is the first out and out indisputable Ho movie to come through the doors of TYTD towers and, while all the Ho tropes are here, it’s…not exactly his best known work. it’s a fine enough movie. I just dont really think it delivers the full Ho clout that say “Ninja Terminator” would.

That being said! I do hope to cover more Ho in future! going so far as to pick up Gold Ninja Videos “Ninja Vortex” set so that I can really bring out the best of Ho in future!

Really; thats one of the only problems with doing this channel on a weekly basis, given how long it takes to write, record and edit each episode I can only really produce 1 maybe 2 videos a week tops (and im stretched at that!) I also have a MASSIVE pile of martial arts movies to go through even with the 7 movie Ho pack out of the equation! I just wish I had more time to put to the channel honestly as some of these martial arts movies have been in my collection “to watch” since before I even STARTED doing reviews…anyway! Godfrey Ho! pink ninjas! its all good! give it a watch!

This poster says NOTHING about the movie. and because all the colours are kind of on the same side of the colour wheel it doesnt really make anything stand out. it just looks like a load of variations of red splatted on the poster. needs more distinction.

The American Ninja 4: The Annihilation (1990)

As part of the 2nd half of our 5th anniversairy celebrations, im going to be dipping into the vaults to cover some movies that, in the past, i’d promised to get round to at some point. and kicking this off we’re finally putting a lid on “The American Ninja” series. I’ve been covering the sequels now for almost as long as the channels been in existence. and with the exception of the first film (which I intend to do a ‘Comedy Dining Experience’ on at some point in the future) we’ve finally arrived at the final chapter here. and WHAT a dissapointing wind down it was.

Im not going to say much more because, honestly, my review here says all there is to say. But I will say that I still find it frankly ASTOUNDING that they had two decently sized action stars in this film and they utilised them in probably the most cack handed way it’s possible to handle these things. I left BEYOND dissapointed. but yeh! after 5 years! we’re bringing this series to a close!

I really like this poster, its such a shame it’s in NO way reflective of the film itself.

The “For Your Eyes Only” (1981) Comedy Dining Experience

Well! it’s November! (at least according to the upload date!) and Dan and Ben are back on the bond once again! this time taking on “For your eyes only” honestly; its been so long since this one went out and the film was SO forgettable (barring the awesome theme tune) that I literally got nothing for this one! we were ACE! probably the best funny people ever (probably) and you should DEFINITELY watch this one RIGHT NOW.

FOR YOUUURRR EYEES ONLYYYYYYYY!!!

Best of the Best 2 (1993)

Oh how the mighty have fallen. I wanted to like this one, I really did. but honestly it’s a total nothing of a film. a totally wasted opportunity thats so forgettable, that apart from the colosseum sections and being angry that Eric Roberts got top billing despite barely doing ANYTHING for the vast majority of the runtime. I can bearly remember anything about this film.

The original film was quite a decent effort, and set the bar very high on a sequel. I didnt expect the sequel to do better than the original. but I didnt expect the quality to drop quite so quickly. This is a series where my excitement to see part 3 went from “Oh man I cant wait!” to “If I can be bothered… in less than 80 minutes.

To add insult to injury, I cant even really show you exactly whats wrong with this film as due to a spurious copyright claim by returning absolute bastard company “Lasso Entertainment” who blocked the video worldwide and abused the appeals process to make sure my review never saw the light of day. Fortunately I uploaded an audio only version, so while its not what I envisioned. at least you can kind of see where I was going (a fully uncensored version with video will be making its way up to breach.tv in the new year.)

The posters literally the best part of this movie, and is 10 times cooler than the film ever will be.

The “Chick Boxer” (1992) Comedy Dining Experience

Well! as part of my exploration into the life and career of J.R Bookwalter I sat down with some VERY pleasent people and we took a look at “Chick Boxer” one of the most notorious films in the “SOV Six Pack” collection. it was a real blast hanging with these guys and I really hope we get to do it again soon!

If you enjoy hearing my friends screams of pain you can find much more of their work at the below links:

George – Here
Chris – Here
G.G – Here