I have never honestly seen a film quite like “Tales from the QuaDead zone” I’ve been aware of Shot on Video (More affectionately known stateside as shot on Shitteo) for years but theres seemingly a major gulf in quality when it comes to the shot on tape genre.
On the one side you have genuine attempts at producing a quality product on a limited budget, these lo-fi cinemasterpieces push the boundaries of tape as a format and are usually produced by film makers who would go onto make great things.
On the other side of the spectrum however you have films like QuaDead, in which all sanity and reason gives way to unregulated pandemonium. This film and films of it’s ilk are atrociously made with no technical skill implemented on almost any level. But what sets this film apart from all the others is its heart. This film has soul. it has feeling. in a world where there are hundreds if not thousands of shot on video movies out there that desperately want to be better movies and are distinctly dead behind the eyes “QuaDead zone” positively oozes character and feels very much like it desperately wants to stand on its own.
In that respect it more than does this successfully. and While I havent seen any of Chesters other films just yet. The two that he has produced are both truely unique viewing experiences that I can highly recommend you check out.
(The Soundtrack is craptacular. and I wish I had this box art as a T-shirt)
What is it with kids films and them being absolutely goddamn awful!? When I first started reviewing films on a weekly basis I would have never have guessed that some of the worst films I would encounter would be aimed at young children, and yet less than 12 months into doing it I’ve stumbled on 2 kids movies that I think are some of the absolute worst I’ve ever sat through.
The problem with this film is its way to sanitized and when it does try to be rebellious, it does so in a way that much like “Lets ruin dads day” could be seen as actually doing more harm to the child than good.
I also tremendously dislike the fact that “Stoney” in this film is kind of forced into the cowboy role even when he opens his heart out to our two leading child actors. Whether by the end of the movie Stoney just feels more comfortable in the role of the cowboy or whether he’s simply relapsed into his “Persona” to keep his friends on side is debateble but yeh, overall this is a cheap and nasty bordering on creepy little kids film and im kind of glad it doesnt have a particularly large audience.
There is a Sequel “Horse Crazy too!” and I promise you now, its a matter of when, not if for when I’ll get round to this one. Because I cant quite believe this film got made. Letalone that someone actively thought that there was enough to go on to produce a sequel. But I will endure because I knew what I was signing up for when I started this. I hope your all grateful.
(You honestly wouldnt believe how much trouble I have finding high resolution box art covers online for these obscure films…it sometimes takes me longer to find a decent image than it does to write the review!)
Season 4! And at the time of writing we’re on the day before my first anniversairy with youtube! These decriptions may end up thinning out a little bit from here on in, mainly due to the fact that when I started writing these overviews of the episodes there was a 10-11 month gap and I’d had plenty of time to re-evaluate my thoughts and feelings about each episode as they went by whereas I watched and recorded my review of house in late January/early February.
As a result its still fairly fresh in my mind, and this is only going to become more commonplace as things go along. Though “House” has been a bit of an interesting ride of highs and lows since my first viewing of it. In my mind I keep flip-flopping between thinking it was a good bit of fun and that I’d really look forward to watching the sequels, while at the exact same time a part of my brain thinks that it’s just a bit of a rubbish fluff and that I should probably put off watching any more of these for a while because I simply have much more interesting stuff I could be watching.
House isnt a perfect movie but since I watched it I think i’ve leaned more towards being interested in seeing more than I have had moments of wishing i’d never seen it. It reminded me a bit of an adult goosebumps. In the sense that it isnt exactly scary, but it is entertaining and has a spooky quality about it. It may come across to me a bit like a prototype of “The Burbs” but ultimately I guess its an enjoyable little movie in and of itself.
When it came to choosing a “Red Triangle” that would see off “Alternate Doctor who month” it was really no question in my mind at least that porn would be the end result. I mean, I maybe could have gone with Torchwood or Class…something a bit more adult but still in universe, but I thought it was too mainstream, too well connected to the series to fly to be honest.
Next my thoughts went to BBV and there were some very serious considerations for “The Airzone Solution” or the “Auton” series. But again while I think they may work well as a TYTD episode in the future it just wasnt right here. Porn. Porn was what was needed and by gum porn was what I settled for!
Of course the options were bountiful (No pun intended) “Doctor who and the Phaleks” was my go to option for the longest time before briefly swapping to the “Woodrocket” sequences, there was even a brief dabble with “Abducted by the daleks” but in the end “Doctor Screw” was one of those porn films that had both not been widely covered and one that I distinctly remember doing the rounds in the early days of the David Tennant era with a dirty smirk and a cheeky chuckle from the Doctor who fandom back in the day. so I was happy to pick that one purely due to its lack of coverage.
It’s quite frankly appauling as pornography. But in terms of being a piece of alternative cultural history it really is a piece of its time. I pretty much say everything I can possibly say about this series in my review itself but even for its impotence I’d recommend fans of the new series check this one out. it’s really weird due to just how early it came out in the new series’ run and as a result it kind of fudges its way through the best it can. It’s also interesting from a historical standpoint as it marks the transition between porn parodies being a cheap and cheerful rubbish affair to being a highly polished and nightmare inducing rubbish affair (Im looking at you Strokemon).
Either way this is a very bizarre notch in Doctor who history and I really couldnt think of a better way to see this season off.
(I really love that boxart for the complete set…I own the solo releases and they’re rubbish by comparison…)
I have a bit of a love/hate relationship with the Projection room films in all honesty. In the past 5 years or so things seemingly have gone quite quiet for the fan production group from the north of England with there intricate and entangled multiverses…
My main problem I seem to remember having with them (It has been a couple of years since I last went through them all) is that they do seem to take themselves very seriously. While theres definitely an aire of fun behind all of the films they’ve produced, I do rather get the feeling that theres a subtle hint of egotism behind there projects. just a dash…I see it in there extensive extras packages which compile various minor TV appearences and making of documentaries that pretty much consist of Chris Hoyle just regailing his memories of being on set. the fact I paid money for these films at one point or another. Where as Ausweb and the likes seemed unashamedly for fun and they felt completely comfortable producing a lower budget/quality movie with its sould in the right place. the later Projection room films just seem to be missing a bit of heart. just that vibe that says “We’re having a laugh here” to me, the later films from this group just kind of feel a little bit like they quite desperately want to be closely tied to the show in any possible way, forgetting that ultimately they’re both the largest fan film group for Doctor who in the country and the longest established fan film group in the country.
I’ll probably air those grievences though next time I decide to do a Doctor who month. For now though it’s 1994 and the projection rooms little more than this movie and possible two very short stories. it’s a small group of friends making a goofy and very affectionate fan film trying to continue a series that was in the midst of the early half of a 16 year hiatus. and its all good fun really. I was maybe a bit overly harsh with this one, on its own its perfectly find I feel I may have had my enthusiasm dampened for it somewhat by the history that would be written after this movie got made.
The Crystal of Achillon is arguably one of the perfect starting points if your looking to get into Doctor who fan films. as is the projection room for that matter. through there history you’ll see fan films done right, fan films done very wrong and better still quite a few cast and crew members went on to make their own fan films independent from the projection room. In terms of british fan films. The projection room arguably is the core of a very very sprawling hobby. and I can only commend them for it in that regard.
(Yeh; my thoughts and feelings on the projection room are a bit garbled. they’ve been going for so long its impossible not to feel mixed about what they do and how they do it)
Australian Abminable Snowmen is the second and final venture into Doctor who for Butchgro films and it upsets me really that outside of potentially doing commentaries for these two short films that its very unlikely I’ll ever be able to talk about a Butchgro production again.
I have a genuine soft spot for these movies. they genuinely seem to have come from a place of admiration for the TV show they’re remaking. the cast seem very positive about it and as far as I can tell they’re proud of what they were able to achieve back in the early/mid 90’s.
These films are not masterpieces. I’d be being disingenuous if I were to say these were high quality master works. They are however very joyous and very entertaining. I can smile along and enjoy these films while feeling the fun the cast and crew were having when making these films. And these were dedicated fans. in this film alone they travelled many miles just to find authentic snow for a handful of shots to illustrate the outer border of the monestary. When the filming finished/juddered to a halt they both sat through over 12 months of solid graft editing in order to ensure that the movie would be finished. Even if there would only ever be a handful of people who’d ever actually even see it. This was nearly a full decade before youtube would become a thing you have to imagine so they made this film knowing that, other than there small circle of friends, noone may actually see this.
Since releasing these two reviews I have recieved some very kind words both from David Butcher (Who reiterated him and Grants full intent to remaster and re-release these two movies (Which I sincerely hope they do) and members of the gallifrey base message board who seemingly had little to no idea that this movie even existed in the first place.
I dont want to sound egotistical but im glad I did my bit to ensure that this movie got seen again. And if your a veteran of the cult and strange cinema genre I highly recommend you check these two films out. There weird wonderful a a genuinely fun experience to zone out to. a definate watch from me!
(While Snowmen is entertaining “Ausweb” will always hold a special place in my heart)
Its not difficult to fail in the genre of Documentary, Sometimes your documentary will contain false information accidentally, quite often Documentaries simply become redundent due to new information coming to light or events occuring that make them no longer relevent.
But “Dr who: The Lost Interviews” is rather special in the sense that it completely and totally failed right out of the gate simply by not caring about the facts or about making it a worthwhile purchase. This doc is pretty much entirely built on hearsay, rumours and grossly misleading information. it looks like it was assembled by someone who’d never touched editing software before in there lives (And I say that as a professional editor with rapidly approaching 10 years experience in my field) and quite frankly it comes across as money grabbing.
I would say that Neil Sean strikes me as the kind of person who would have strong appeal amongst your casual tv and film viewer. the kind of person who’ll happily flop in front of “Corrie” for every episode through a week, the sort who’d read “Take a break” and who watched the royal wedding with tears streaming down there faces (IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN ME DAMNIT!)…*Ahem*…What im saying is that, had Mr. Sean booked up a bit more about Doctor who and played this as a “Beginners guide to behind the scenes” for Doctor who then it may have been a completely different approach. As it stands this DVD is marketing itself as something for the “Hardcore” fans by promising exclusive interviews, insider gossip and a deep look into the current workings of the show. and it flounders quite spectacularly in doing this.
Now Im sure Mr. Sean in real life is a lovely man and at the same time I respect that everyone has to earn a living. But the absolute cheek of this guy to try and flog a few off cut interviews with his hosting links bundled in and to try and make out tha this will be a release that no Who fan should be without is bordering on the offensive.
Quite mercifully Neil sean has since moved to youtube where if his videos views are anything to go by he hasnt garnered much interest. I feel in some ways relieved that apart from the inevitable review of his “Dad’s army” dvd I most likely wont have to go near one of his “Official releases” again.
(Also; Please please please go and check out Dave Gormans blog posts on Neil Sean, He’s much more eloquent and better at grammar than me.)
David Butcher is a lovely man. I really cannot reiterate that enough. “Australian Web of fear” spent a rediculous amount of time in total obscurity for me. For a number of years all I knew about it was that it was either made in australia or featured an all australian cast and that it was produced by “Butchgro” films. A company that I could only find the barest of bare information on. In fact; before speaking to David for the first time the accumulated 6-7 years of reseach I had done on this film had led me as far as being able to identify that this was indeed made in Australia at some point in the early 90’s or late 1980’s and that whoever “Butchgro” were they’d also done a version of “The Abominable snowmen” though at the time I only had access to “Web”.
A bit further down the line I eventually got my hands on both movies but for the best part of 5 years I did wonder whatever had happened to the lads at “Butchgro” did they maybe make even more Doctor who fan films that hadnt yet surfaced? Maybe there was a treasure trove of movies. Maybe they rebranded and were making movies to this day! I seriously thought of everything except the most obvious thing. Facebooking there names. In 2017 I did that just on a whim and was able to get in touch with David who was lovely, warm and up for talking about a movie he made well over 20 years previously! He informed me that since his film making days he pretty much spends his time these days prop building and that he’s actually appeared in Doctor who magazine multiple times and also in a Documentary that went out around the 50th anniversairy of the shows first episode while dressed in an “Earthshock” era Cyberman costume that he himself built!
Australian Web of fear to me is a wonderfully fun little film. the passion the cast and crew must have had to see this finished is nothing short of awe inspiring. it may not be the prettiest film to look at but I can honestly say I’ve never seen anything like it, at the point of writing this the video currently sits well above 300 views; which may not seem like a lot. But to me that 300+ people who’ve been introduced to Butchgro films catalogue and I feeel like I’ve done my bit to raise awareness in that sense.
I’d still love them to make another movie at some point in the future…whether its an original work or whether they ever choose to go through with there original plans to adapt “Fury from the deep” the idea of a 21st century Butchgro production really puts a smile on my face. David didnt rule it out either! he said it was somewhat unlikely but thats not a catagoric no! so for now I’ll live in hope.maybe one day I’ll get my hands on a cleaner copy of this movie than the “n’th” generation copy I currently have. that in itself would be a treat! but for now im quite happy to squint along to this version knowing that at least I have a copy of this movie in my possession!
(I still say my favourite sequence in this movie is the battle in the park where the yeti gets knocked into the water…they really couldnt have done it any better than they did)
This was a quite personal one for me. Not because I have any deep infatuation for the zoo troop. no no! they were well after my time! but it was personal for me because it allowed me a little bit of wriggle room to really remenise about my childhood. This video may paint a somewhat darker tinge to aspects of my life, but its weird what you pick up on as an adult that as a kid you think nothing of.
Holiday towns in the UK in the 90’s were a quite magical place really, it was a weird time just before the mass renovations that have swept through most seaside towns since the early 2000’s but just after absolute poverty had set in. And it was absolute poverty. The best example I can think of is Rhyl (Which features heavily in the start of this review) In the 90’s my memories of Rhyl are particularly bleak. y’see, before Rhyl ended up being the 50% run down arcades, 50% retirement complex that it is today Rhyl was desolation. I remember with a strange nostalgia the funfair near the entrance to the town that reeked of fag smoke and stale booze and sugar. I recall large gangs of pale hollow men parading along the sea front…the rusted and gnarled railings along the seafront that were held in place only by the dirt and smog given off by the heaving and overbearing traffic. I remember the slums, delapodated terrace houses that ran in rows that were predominatnly housing druggies and other similar nefariousness. And for me probably the most memorable. I remember the smell of cooking meat, burgers and hotdogs the stench of onions stewing in brown water being served by a bloke with a fag on out of a hatch from some godawful arcade that wouldnt be out of place in the Hotel california.
And yet, weirdly as I mention in the review itself I remember all of this with a strange nostalgia. A fondness if you will…As an adult I can appreciate that this was a horrible place to go and im not entirely sure what my parents thought they were doing taking me there. But I find my memories of that to be happy ones somehow. I remember running along the seafront losing a shoe in one of the quicksand-esq drifts, I remember excitedly stroking a stingray in the Sealife center, I have very strong memories of regular visits to an arcade on the seafront of Conwy (Just outside of Rhyl) and for years every summer we’d go for the mini golf, the 2p machines and video games like “The Simpsons arcade game” or “Time crisis 2” or my personal favourite an Addams family pinball machine (Which I believe is still there to this day) I’ll have to visit it again some time soon and get some pictures because as far as I can tell google images doesnt think it exists.
The Zoo troop may have been after my time but Rory was most definitely the coolset cat in town when I was a young’un. Haven caravan holidays may have not been my most favourite thing in the world (Even now I remember lying in bed one night with a massive pile of coats on top of me desperately trying to keep warm while flipping through a black and white A5 “Beano funsize special”
(It was this one specifically if memory serves though I remember it being a darker blue)
Im not entirely painting these holidays as rip roaring fun. But I really need to stress that miraculously somehow they were great. It was pretty much a week of non stop travelling for me visiting castles, beaches, strange shops and eating my weight in Nougat. and while objectively the seaside towns of britain are infinately better in the 21st century. Subjectively I’ll always have a bit of my heart left in the past.
(I never experienced the Zoo troop first hand when they were active. But I can assure you I would have been terrified)
I really wasnt expecting much from “The Bogey man” when I first put it on. The Video Nasties craze of the 1980s was a very sporadic period in the UK with dozens of titles being caught up in the frothing fever of trying to “ban the filth” and this meant that a few titles that really shouldnt have been listed as “Nasties” somehow got sweapt up in the hoopla.
I dont subscribe to the belief that the 1984 video recordings act was in anyway a good thing, I think it heavily censored creativity and drove the interest in these movies into the hands of the underground market where prices ran rampant and quality control was non existent. even if I did accept the act in some capacity (Which I most definitely do not) the consistency was all over the place, with films like “Cannibal Holocaust” and “Maniac Cop” being perfect examples of movies that quite reasonably could justify this act to a degree (They’re both very hard watches that are purposefully designed to be uncomfortable and shocking) through to movies like “The Evil Dead” and “Zombie Flesh Eaters” which while pushing the envelope a bit, were hardly going to “Corrupt the youth”. Conservative drive and a Newspaper driven campaign, only spurred on by the Mary whitehouse brigade only led to further confusion and unwarrented restrictions.
Arguably the most famous being a recurring issue in which police officers would repeatedly seize copies of “The Littlest Whorehouse in Texas” which is a PG comedy movie and copies of “Apocalypse now” which were passed by the BBFC being seized because it sounded too much like a Cannibal movie…only spurring things on and causing a rise in panic, incidents like “The Hungerford massacre” or the “James Bulger” case were sensationalised in the tabloids as being indisputable proof that violent films were corrupting people. In these incidents Hungerfords massacre happened because the killer watched “Rambo 3” (There was no proof of this…The only evidence given was that he’d worn a bandana when he committed the killings), and in the latter “Childs Play 3” was put to blame (Despite the fact that again there was no proof of this and the only evidence was that the killers father had rented the movie, not watched it, and returned it 2 days later) it was this incident that led to one of the “Last hurrah” moments of the Video nasty movement when the Sun ran with the sensationalist front page title “For the sake of ALL our kids Burn your video nasties”
Today barring a few seconds of animal cruelty here and there almost all of the original banned video nasties have not only been released but have been released officially multiple times both in standard and High definition. Theres only one video nasty that remains thats still been denied a classification, that’s “Love Camp 7” but a majority have now been released uncut. And being able to see these films for what they are and realise that a majority of them were purely on the list because of histeria is both eye opening and distressing to me.
The Boogey man is the perfect example of this. This movie has 2 graphic moments in it pretty much, and quite honestly theres much much worse out there. This shouldnt have been on the video nasties list and yet both this and the movies sequel (Which im told is a total and utter raging toxic sludge of a movie) were on the banned list with litte to no justification.
And its a pretty okay movie to boot!, its no masterpiece but I was really genuinely surprised by just how high quality it was when compared with some of the shinola on the banned list. it made it to my “Shelf of interest” as a quirky and slightly unusual oddity. One I’d reccommend you look out for.
(The Posters misleading as well…there are windows, women and shadowy figures in the movie…but not necessarily all at once)
TYTD Reviews 